Why YELLOW BIRD?
What did finding second-time romantic love have to do with publishing a dream? “Go for it!” Michael encouraged me when I randomly mentioned I had this book, written one hot summer many years ago. Before cell phones or computers. Before email and text messaging.
Oh, and yes, by the way – Michael and I ? We fell in love and were married 6 months ago! “Why not?” he said. “What do you have to lose? Do it.” A statement, to be sure, that had double meaning!
Yikes! Should I dig it out of moth balls? Was a bucket list dream really possible, even imminent — could I publish the book I had written so long ago? Where would I start?
The earliest version of YELLOW BIRD was definitely entertaining, but it was written wearing rose colored glasses. I was young, inexperienced, an incurable romantic envisioning myself as one of the heroines I loved to read about. My worldly experiences stemmed from my Junior Year Abroad in college, and escapades as a single girl in NYC in the early 70’s. My characters lacked complexity and substance. Understandably so — what depth and insight about romance, love, and life can a 30-something bring to the pages of any book, let alone a best selling novel?
But why not? I mused. If I was brave enough and confident enough to dive deep into a new relationship, to open my heart and to fall in love again, then I could certainly finish writing and publish YELLOW BIRD. I had learned, experienced, even suffered so much over the 40+ years since those first words were written. My characters deserved to benefit from those life lessons as well. I imagined how much more meaningful their personalities and back stories could be — feeling genuine emotions, deeper feelings, open to and demanding stronger and more honest communication and relationships. I gave my characters the new life they deserved. Definitely worth the risk. Take a peek into the characters of Desiree and Jay from YELLOW BIRD:
Jay – A Man of Honor caught up in a promise and a secret
“So give…” Dave (Jay’s friend and business partner) took a swig of his drink as the bartender went to another customer.
“Geez, man, I’m in so over my head,” lamented Jay as he stared into his drink. “I think I’ve really fucked up what could be the best thing that ever happened to me. It’s turned into a total nightmare.”
“So wait…back up. Who and what are we talking about?
“That crazy old man …. O’Conner’s secret deal.”
“ The water filtration deal?”
“Yeh, it’s turned into a circus.” Jay turned and finally looked at Dave.
“Holly shit….who punched you?” Dave stared at Jay’s eye, wincing.
“His lawyer.”
“What? When…and why?”
“Jealousy. He …the lawyer…thinks I slept with O’Conner’s daughter and cheated her out of her inheritance.”
“What the…hey…you better start at the beginning.” Dave held up his hand to the bartender and ordered two more drinks as Jay laid out the convoluted details of the last couple of weeks.
A bit later Dave finally spoke ….. “My friend, you are caught between the proverbial rock and a hard place. But, you know the answer. You gave your word. Your honor’s at stake here. Your integrity, and the promise you made to her father, and indirectly to her. From what you’ve said, she has the same values. And if everything you told me is true about her, once she knows the whole story, she’ll understand. But ironically, if you break any part of that promise, if you don’t see this through exactly the way O’Conner wanted, she will find that out….and you my friend, will definitely lose her because she’ll never, ever trust you.”
And for second time in several days, two men raised their glasses and toasted, “To Desiree!”
Desiree – A Complex Woman driven by honor, integrity, and loyalty
At last Desiree was ready to hear what Elliott had to say about her father. Elliott had a very stern look on his face; he was in lawyer mode, and Desiree knew that meant business.
“I’m afraid it will be rather a shock to you.”
“I said I’m ready. For heaven’s sake, Elliott, save the dramatics for a jury.” Once Desiree made up her mind about something, she wanted to get it over with. But actually, she didn’t feel as confident as she sounded.
“Sorry.” Elliott smiled apologetically, as he pulled up the chair beside her. He took a deep breath.
“Here it is in a nutshell. P.O.C. Outfitters, for all practical purposes, is bankrupt.”
“What!” Desiree choked on her coffee. “That’s impossible!”
“It’s fact.” Elliott looked her squarely in the eyes. “Your father has been borrowing money from the company for years to subsidize his “inventions” as you all call them. Specifically, that water purification system that he gave to Cranford.”
“He wouldn’t do that,” defended Desiree. “He would never jeopardize the company and all our people, they’re family! There must be some mistake.”
“There’s no mistake.” Desiree heard the disapproval, almost contempt, in Elliott’s voice. He had never believed in Pat O’Conner’s inventions. He considered them the playthings of an eccentric old man. Now, this made it worse.
“He would have paid it all back,” Desiree stated matter of factly.
“I’m sure he intended to.” conceded Elliott. “But unfortunately, he’s dead, and you are the heir to a bankrupt company. In fact, Desiree, I really recommend that you file CHAPTER 11 immediately and lay it all to rest.”
“Well, why don’t we just announce it to the whole world while we’re at it.” She stared at Elliott. “I will not file for bankruptcy. What about our 60 people, Lil and the rest of them? They need that company. It’s their entire life. No, there must be another way.” Desiree sat lost in thought, thinking about where she could raise enough money to pay off the creditors.
A few days later, Desiree sent Lil to the bank with a personal check written out for cash. It was for half the money she had received for her drawings. “Get it in hundreds, fifties, and twenties,” Desiree had instructed her. When Lil returned, Desiree divided it into envelopes and paid the salaries of the twenty-two employees that had stayed, Lil included.
Lil stormed into Desiree’s office, a deep frown on her face and determination in her voice. “I won’t take this.” Lil threw the money down on Desiree’s desk and stood with her arms folded across her chest.
The effect was dramatic. Desiree looked at the envelope and looked up at Lil. It was like Deja vu. Desiree remembered a time over twenty years ago when Lil had caught her giving away her doll clothes to the children who lived next door to the warehouse. It had been a benevolent gesture on Desiree’s part, but the result was futile. The children had no dolls, and Desiree’s dolls ended up with no clothes.
Desiree smiled at the memory and at Lil’s expression. “Don’t be silly,” she said stubbornly.
“Your father would roll over in his grave if he knew you were doing this, Desiree.” Lil felt her throat tighten with emotion, looking at the young woman who had once been the little girl she had seen grow up, sitting at her father’s desk, doling out her own money to pay salaries. “It’s not right.”
“Yes, it is.” Desiree’s chin came up, and the Irish fire shot from her eyes. “Poppy would have done exactly the same thing.”
Lil opened her mouth to argue with her young friend and then closed it again. Desiree had grown up these last six months. A rather spoiled little girl had suddenly blossomed into a mature, responsible young woman, and Lil felt very, very proud for any part that she may have played in the metamorphosis. Anyway, Lil had also learned long ago not to meddle when an O’Conner had made up his or her mind.
“Yes,” said Lil slowly, appraising Pat O’Conner’s daughter. “Yes, I suppose he would have.” Lil turned and left but still did not take the envelope.
To be continued – Watch here for Post #2